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Saturday, October 20, 2007
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PLUGS: Everyone


On a lighter note for my blog, Ate Kitty still remembers me and gave me this UUBBERR CUUTEE Halloween giftie and a fabulous award!! Sniff... thank you soo much Ate for remembering me!! I've been such a sloth in the blogging world and yet you still remembered me....Yey for witches!! hehe

So Kawaii! hehee. I've also updated my Windows theme and desktop. I found this AWESOME theme called PepperedThree and a dock called RK launcher and now makes my Windows look oh so Mac-ish! I've always wanted a Mac, now I can at least feeel it!! heehee!

New wallpaper and theme! So black noh? Down there is my RK Launcher

Open up my docs and this is what ya get! hehee

Well I think am feeling better now... less morbid!! haahaahaa! Tc everyone!!


So it's been, yeah, a month and what have I learned? Sighs... I don't know. A month's passed but I feel like it's been 10 years what with the bruhahas that's been happening. I mean, all the major school entrance exams are over (well major for me anyway) and I have no idea if I'm gonna pass them ( I SURE HOPE I DO!), 2nd quarter's over and I feel like I'm hanging on a thread in the honor roll, and lastly, I'm on an emotional rollercoaster.

This is such a bad way to go back to blogging but I needed to vent my... confusions. I feel so angry and alone all the time that it somehow threatens to shatter the sphere that I've surrounded myself in. I want to let it out but I can't. I'm so confused now with my life, my friends, and my ideals. I feel like I don't know anyone anymore and I feel like I'm being selfish for thinking of this. I feel so jealous too for no goshdarn reason. I want i want i want, it's all i ever think about? Am I deprived from luxuries? No! I try so hard to think of people less fortunate than I am but how come the feeling won't leave? Please God I hope that I am not straying from your path.

I feel like such a failure. I try to project to people that I'm strong or whatever, you know, the tough guy effect but I don't know how I can pull it off much l0nger. No this isn't a suicidal thing, I'm too chicken to kill myself. I guess I'm just depressed. I need to find my path again. I need to reflect on my life.... I wish I could go somewhere and think this over....

God sees the truth but waits... waits for what? Does God wait for us? I think He does. He waits for us to find ourselves... but I hope that God can hear me... I can't find myself alone... I hope He does help me...

See ya guys.... ='(

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